An Unpopular Idea

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In October 1972 All in the Family was in its second full season and in the midst of what would be a five–year reign at the top of the national TV ratings.

Everyone, it seemed, was watching, and it gave the writers a bully pulpit any president would envy. They responded with a series of episodes that continually broke new ground in American comedy.

The episode that aired on this night in 1972, "The Bunkers and the Swingers," dealt with the subject of wife swapping — a topic that was rarely mentioned on TV at that time.

Lee Kalcheim, Michael Ross and Bernie West won a Primetime Emmy for their writing in this episode, which gave a different spin on freedom of speech and protecting the expression of unpopular ideas (or, in this case, lifestyles).

Edith (Jean Stapleton) had found a magazine on the subway and had been drawn to the recipe section — not noticing that the magazine was about the wife swapping lifestyle. Next to the recipes she found a "swap section" — classified ads seeking couples for rendezvous although they appeared to be worded as ambiguously as possible. The ad that drew Edith's attention spoke of a couple seeking another couple to "swap good times."

Edith responded, and the wheels were in motion for the couple (played by Rue McClanahan and Vincent Gardenia) to pay the Bunkers a visit.

But Edith shared the information with Gloria (Sally Struthers), who immediately realized that the couple's intentions were not what Edith thought they were, and she shared the information with Mike (Rob Reiner), insisting that he had to do something. He resisted.

"How am I going to explain wife swapping to your mother?" he asked.

"Just tell her in plain, simple English," Gloria replied.

"Well, you tell her in that English!" Mike said.

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Mike and Gloria had tickets to see the ballet so they couldn't stay to explain things to Edith. But Mike sent a telegram to the couple telling them to cancel their plans to visit.

He didn't realize that the couple was already en route to the Bunkers' and arrived only minutes after Mike and Gloria left.

Archie wasn't sure what to make of them, but he warmed up to them when they gave him a box of prime cigars. And Edith was given perfume — Chanel No. 5.

"That's their highest number," she told Archie.

Turned out the guests were trophy winners in an annual dance contest, and they used that as a way to break the ice with the Bunkers.

But the Bunkers eventually learned the couple's true nature, and Archie was livid. He told them they were communists.

McClanahan's character tried to explain to Edith. Their marriage "didn't seem to matter anymore," she said. "We were drowning. Swinging saved us!"

Edith replied, "I think I would rather have drowned."

The couple left, a somewhat tragic figure even though Gardenia's character said a familiar line to students of history. It would do today's students well to remember it.

"I may not agree with what you say, but I will defend to the death your right to say it."

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Forty–five years after Gardenia spoke that line on All in the Family, it is a timely reminder of the way that unpopular ideas are being stifled on America's college campuses. The story was a reminder of why we have freedom of speech in this country. Popular ideas don't need protection. Unpopular ideas do.

Well, McClanahan and Gardenia's figures were tragic in this episode, but their futures weren't. Both had bright futures in the All in the Family universe. McClanahan went on to co–star on Maude, which was the first All in the Family spinoff, before becoming a regular on The Golden Girls.

Gardenia — in a different role — was the Bunkers' neighbor for a couple of seasons, but his primary vocation was in the movies. He was even nominated for an Oscar at the same time he was playing Frank Lorenzo in 1973.

Death of a Dingbat

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When I was growing up, the television character I may have admired most was Edith Bunker of All in the Family.

Edith was played by Jean Stapleton, who died in New York yesterday at the age of 90.

All in the Family was truly a groundbreaking program, and it is no exaggeration to say that it changed the lives of those who participated in it. It also changed America, and Stapleton had a lot to do with that. She was the long–suffering wife of Archie Bunker, whose name quickly became synonymous with bigotry.

If someone was designated "an Archie Bunker," it was not necessary to explain the meaning of that metaphor. Everyone knew what it meant.

But I never heard anyone described as "an Edith Bunker." That was a shame because, although her character was written to be a dimwit (or, rather, a "dingbat," as Archie called her), she was often the voice of sanity and wisdom.

Now, I did hear some people described as dingbats in the '70s. But that was more a general reference, a characteristic.

Archie may not have had much regard for Edith's wisdom, but the audience did. It was hard not to.

She had her weaknesses, but they were endearing ones. Archie complained that Edith was long–winded, that it took her forever to tell a simple story, and there was some truth to that.

But Edith was frequently saying things that would make the others stop and think. In one episode, I recall, Edith and Archie were visited by Edith's cousin and her husband, who had just returned from an expensive trip and couldn't wait to brag about it.

But all was not well in paradise. When Edith and her cousin were alone, the cousin confided that her marriage was falling apart, and she questioned Edith about the secret of her marital success. Edith was hesitant to say much until her cousin asked her if, in her intimate moments with Archie, she still saw "fireworks like on the Fourth of July."

Edith smiled in a shy, almost embarrassed way, and replied, "With Archie and me, it's more like Thanksgiving."

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On another occasion, when Mike and Gloria's marriage was on the rocks, Edith started to tell another story, one about a fight her parents had when she was small. The argument began over maple syrup, and it ended with the two of them not speaking for several weeks. Eventually, Edith said, they made up, "but things was never the same between them."

In what I always thought was one of Edith's finest moments, she looked at Mike and Gloria and said, "Now, I know maple syrup is a little thing, but would you rather break up over something bigger?"

It was easy to wonder in those days why Edith would stay with someone who had no more appreciation for her than to call her a dingbat. Well, I guess you had to understand that it was the writers who put the words in Edith's mouth; Jean Stapleton merely interpreted the lines as any good actor/actress will do.

And the writers had an explanation.

Gloria asked Edith early in the series why she had chosen Archie over another suitor.

"Well, I liked being called a Goddess of Beauty," Edith replied, "but somehow it seemed more permanent when your father called me a dingbat."

That was Edith logic, I guess.

But Edith brought attention to things that weren't being mentioned in television in those days. She found a lump in her breast and forced people to think about something they didn't want to think about. After all, if it could happen to Edith, well, it could happen to anyone.

She was a moral compass without being preachy about it.

No dingbat she.